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Episode #35 - Friday the 13th (2009)

March 26th, 2013

The original Friday the 13th was a campy, low budget, atmospheric slasher movie that spawned an entire franchise built around Jason Voorhees. Michael Bay's 2009 remake is a bland, generic, slick, modern horror movie that happens to feature a killer wearing a hockey mask. Jared Padalecki stars as Clay, a man who's sister has gone missing in the general vicinity of Camp Crystal Lake, where years earlier a woman wiped out an entire camp's worth of counselors because they let her son, Jason, drown. Turns out, he's still alive. Whoops... awkward. Now, Jason is killing a new group of 20-somethings who are just looking to have a good time as Clay searches for his missing sister. We were as shocked as anyone to find a movie that makes Friday the 13th Part V look like Psycho. Grab your LL Bean catalogs, put on your potato sacks, and joins us as we slowly feed Friday the 13th into a wood chipper!

Episode #34 - Cold Light of Day

March 19th, 2013

We here at Stop the Movie have a special place in our hearts for the character Sigourney Weaver played in "Abduction", so you can only imagine how delighted to we were to see her playing the exact same character in this week's movie! "Cold Light of Day" is a film that makes even leading man Henry Cavill's fan club groan. Cavill plays a failed entrepreneur whose father, played by Bruce Willis, leads a secret double life as a CIA agent who has stolen some very sensitive materials from an army of Spanish terrorists. After his family is taken hostage by the terrorists, Cavill must run like a madman through the streets of Madrid and figure out how to meet the terrorists' demands, while simultaneously evading Weaver and the CIA. Hide your guns in the nearest dumpster, throw your phones into the ocean, and join us as we mercilessly interrogate Cold Light of Day!

Episode #33 - Supernova

March 12th, 2013

James Spader and Angela Bassett star in a Sci-Fi "thriller" so inane that none of it's multiple directors wanted their name attached to it. After responding to a distress call, the crew of a medical space ship come across a lone treasure hunter who has discovered a glowy space bomb that gives him superhuman powers... powers which he eventually use to take over the ship. Now Spader must stop him from killing everybody and selling the bomb, which is so powerful, it can create a supernova if detonated. Watch as Robert Forrester dies way too early... See Robin Tunney struggle to keep her clothes on... Marvel at Lou Diamond Phillip's inability to stop rubbing his face all over the radioactive space rock... Find out which podcaster is founding a fan club dedicated to one of the stars of the film! Double check your hyperdrive pods, put on your armor suit, and join us as we give Supernova the finger!


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